Today is like your mom making you a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with the kind of bread you like, soft and mushy and white, instead of the organic crap she's been buying that's dotted with seeds and small pebbles and barnacles, and the sun is shining and you're allowed to watch TV for an extra hour because you're dad's out at the bar again because his college friend Popper is in town, and the name of the show on the television is The Dukes of Hazzard.