Behind on the Snappy Dresser relaunch, behind on the redesign for this here site, behind on my list of priorities at The Big Place I Work.

All because the chickens demand Lebensraum.

The wife convinced me yesterday that what was most needed on the estate grounds was more room for the chickens to run about. So I dragged some power tools out into the driveway, bought some cheap wood at the local lumberyard, and started the job of expanding their outdoor pen over 200%.

This sort of construction allows one to call upon deeply buried knowledge across many disciplines: physics ("How hard to I need to smack this mosquito to kill it?"), trignonometry ("at what angle is the circular saw least likely to cause a major arterial wound?", biology ("will a mosquito attempt to drink blood spewing from a major arterial wound?"), and so on. I wisely ignored all attempts at an analytic approach, however, and applied more useful collegiate knowledge by quickly opening a beer before starting.

Framing, cutting, drilling — I was like Jimmy Carter on a Habitat for Humanity project, except that I didn't give away any strategically important canals before I finished. And also, much like everything Carter was involved with, the project is incomplete. I still need to add some fencing to the frames, the gate needs a support crossbar and hinges. And I'm thinking about moving the barbecue next to the pen as an added incentive for good poultry behavior.

So the redesigns will finish tonight, and the birds will enjoy conditions far better than they deserve.