Since so much of my "work" on the Internet is scattered about all willy-nilly, I have decided to occasionally post some of these past embarassments from time to time on this site. Today's entry was written in November 2000, back when I still lived in Boston and before Christina Aguilera was viciously attacked by her makeup bag.

While walking through Davis Square today, I tried to recruit members for my army of zombies.

In order to identify myself to potential zombies, I walked with stiff legs and arms thrust out in front of me. I repeated the only zombie word I know — "nnnnnhhhh" — and ambled around the brick plaza in the center of the square. The message was clear: "Zombies, unite around me and we shall crush the living! Their tender brains shall be our sustenance! Nnnnnhhh!"

While I found no willing recruits, I did discover one striking thing: pigeons are scared shitless of zombies.